"Walk Uphill" explained.

More than a catchy phrase!

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“I will turn all my mountains into roads, and my highways will be raised up. “

Isaiah 49:11

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JUSTIN:

In January of 2019, while looking for a second opinion on my diagnosis, I read Isaiah 49:11 and felt like the Lord say that He would turn this mountain of ALS into a road, but that I would have to walk uphill. Hearing the Lord on this gave me mixed feelings for awhile. On one hand I was grateful to have reassurance that He would be with me in this. On the other hand I wondered how long this walk was going to be and how steep? At this point in my journey my symptoms were very minimal and I had no clue what it would be like down the road. I was largely untested in life with just about everything someone could want. This impression from the Lord was fairly vague and probably left me with more questions than answers. I think God did this on purpose because at the end of the day I was going to have to learn to trust in Him even when I can't see around the next turn.

I would often go into periods of doubt and say "did I really hear the Lord on this? " or "the Lord was not telling Isaiah about my journey of ALS, so this is an abuse of scripture." Well, the devil is an accuser and is busy at work! In these moments I remind myself that the Word of God is that He will never leave me nor forsake me. I trust that He is faithful even if I am not faithful. I thank Him that he speaks to me and calls me a son.

LORI:

Justin heard something from the Lord five years ago, and we’re going with it!

Justin and I both function in the same way in that we’re very careful when someone says “they heard ___ from the Lord”.  There is a lot of abuse and misuse of those words and we take these words seriously because of the weight they naturally carry. 

So, naturally, when he shared this impression with me, I listened attentively for all the tiny little nuances and specific details of his healing that I assumed would be following. 

What followed was a tad different and needed “unpacking”. He said something like “I feel like the Lord showed me Isaiah 49:11”. I couldn’t recall the verse, so I looked it up. It read: “I will turn all my mountains into roads, and my highways will be raised up.” It seemed a little vague and didn’t clarify if we were going to see healing or not. He shared how he felt like the Lord was calling him to walk uphill, but that He would turn his mountains into roads... hmmm… “still needing more here, Justin!” I reacted as I usually do with any set of instructions and started asking questions- “to clarify, does this mean you will get healing or won’t? Does that mean you’re going to get worse before you’re better? Shoot… does this mean it will be an uphill battle? Wait, does it mean we’ll reach the top and then start descending with healing in hand?” At this point in time Justin had barely experienced any symptoms and we were hoping for a misdiagnosis. So, truthfully, this word initially felt crushing, because regardless of the end goal it meant an uphill battle.  That didn’t sound appealing to my 9 month pregnant body. How will I walk uphill while nursing a newborn, wrangling a toddler, and carrying my husband with ALS- it sounded terrifying, impossible, and I knew we’d need others (more on #community later).

But, this verse has become one that has steadied us through this journey.  As symptoms started it helped us buckle up for the journey ahead, but also set on eyes on the promise of hope (more on the complications of #hope later!)- Every mountain no matter how big has a peak. 

We often joke with each other and ask, “How far up the mountain do you think we are today?”

Often, with impressions or words from the Lord, time seems to reveal nuances that speak more potently at different times. I feel like I am in full sherpa mode right now. But, the hope set before me keeps me going knowing that the testimony we’ll have in hand from the top will be so much better than the testimony of faith we had before we hitched ourselves to each other and took our first step uphill. Mountains have a way of feeling more real as you get deep into your trek, but I sure don’t want to disappoint my experienced-backpacker-husband with my hiking skills, and so I follow his lead on what hiking + faith looks like and keep moving forward towards the light knowing the peak is worth the sweat.

XO,

Justin+Lori